I have read a two books and watched a management series by Henry Cloud. I have been impressed with his action orientated teaching.  When I received an email about a series of Webinars from Dr Cloud and Dr Townsend, I thought I would sign up.  I got a little more than I bargained for. 

The first webinar was about the barriers to change.  Nothing earth shattering or convicting here.  It was good information, but I didn't see any of "afraid to change" factors present in me.  (I will come back to this - maybe not the best conclusion on my part.)

The second webinar started by a challenge to write down the goal that you have for your life; the reason that you started watching these webinars in the first place.  This is where the trouble started.  I was unable to come up with a goal.  I mean, I have goals, but they seem kind of trivial and really short term - get this project done, wrap up this project, etc.; not the kind of goal that requires life change or a more radical movement.  I really could not come up with anything that seemed like a worthwhile goal.  That was really disheartening to me - so disheartening I stopped watching the webinar. 

Then the questioning started.  Have I become so complacent and content in my life that I have no aspirations anymore?  Have I achieved everything that I am supposed to achieve?  Am I afraid to step out?  Have I closed my mind to the possibility of larger goals because I am comfortable?  Am I just too tired to aspire?  Positive answers to any of these questions is depressing. 

Here is the problem.  I am a mountain climber.  I love to dream and make those dreams reality.  I love to move forward.  I love to change.  I love to be a change agent. This is how I am wired and one of the contributions that I believe I bring to this world.  I think this is where the "depression" set in: the gap between were I am (no goals) and who I believe I am (action orientated).

OK, so I have to do some work.  I have to make sure that there are no personal barriers to me changing or moving - that I am not lying to myself when I thought that I got a passing grade on all the reasons why people don't change.  Secondly, I believe that I need to listen more to the Spirit.  I cannot believe that He is done with me - that I have no other mountains to climb.  I just need to listen, clearly listen to what He would have me do.

One of my driving passions has been to spend/invest my life - not to waste it.  Being sedentary is wasting it......

I guess the reason I wrote this is so that you do not become complacent either.  Do not waste your life.  Keep moving and don't be content with the status quo.