What would you think, do, feel, etc. if Jesus were to knock on the door of your house and want to come in and visit with you? I was thinking about this the other morning as I was meditating on Jesus washing the feet of the disciples in John 13. As I read the response of Peter to Jesus' desire to wash his feet thought of what my response would be?
Several possibilities went through my mind: a great big hug, treating him like a friend that I had not seen for a long time; a hand shake and warm welcome; tears of joy because I finally was able to look at him face to face; terror, like if a police officer were to show up and inform me of some bad news; or a complete dismantling of my inner being resulting in me fainting. I am not sure which of these is the correct response; they all seem like viable alternatives to me.
I was challenged in my spirit that one attitude that I might feel would be "justified": thanks Jesus for washing my feet; I have served you all these years and thanks for the payback. As I pursued that thought line in my mind, I was drawn to the "good son" in the prodigal parable that Jesus told. He was ticked off because dad celebrated the return of the scum ball son who had squandered wealth and really wished that his dad was dead. It was almost like he was saying "you owe me; I stayed home and didn't get to live a wild life" (hear "like I kind of wanted to; I was the responsible one"). This attitude is an attitude of pride; of self centeredness; of failure to recognize true mercy and grace (after all, it was his dad's money not his).
After being challenged in my spirit about this attitude, I began to pray that I would not become arrogant and prideful in what GOD is accomplishing through me and around me. I was challenged to remember that it is HIS work and HIS fruit and HIS resources (Psalm 24:1). I believe that the appropriate response to Jesus at my door is one of being unworthy to stand before my Lord; not because of my sin (that is gone), but because of the EXTREME amount of kindness, mercy and grace He has given me that is radically disproportionate to what I have given Him.